Yesterday I was verbally accosted by a co-worker. Because I stood at her desk (in front of her chair) to leave her a note that I'd stopped by when she was out, she accused me of sneaking up on her, trying to look at her computer to see what she was doing, and violating "her space." Ironically, our boss (the owner of the company that we work for) trusts me with a corporate credit card, I have the credit card account numbers of approximately 50 of my clients and pay for things that are charged to their accounts on a regular basis, and I collect and deposit substantial sums of cash for my employer. So, while my boss and my clients trust me with their funds and their personal property and confidential information, a co-worker doesn't trust me to stand at her desk.
After getting over the initial shock, I took several deep breaths, drafted an e-mail reply to her, took several more deep breaths, and then sent her an e-mail. I told her that I was stunned and offended by her behavior and that I couldn't imagine what would cause her to accuse me of spying on her, and for what purpose? I told her that short of a life-threatening emergency, I would not set foot in her building (much less her "personal space") ever again. All I need is for some cash or her purse to come up missing, and have her blame me for it.
I then proceeded to tell her that since she obviously had concerns about my trustworthiness and my integrity (two values that are extremely important to me), that she, our boss and I should schedule a meeting to discuss her concerns. Almost immediately she responded with a brief e-mail simply saying that she saw no need for a meeting, she was simply letting me know "how she felt."
I spoke with our boss later, who assured me that she had absolutely no concerns about me or my work, and re-iterated that my clients all "love me". She agreed that the 3 of us needed to meet so that we could identify the underlying issues and resolve this matter so we could move forward. She was going to set the meeting up for 2:00. I didn't hear another word until a few minutes before 5, when my boss informed me that the other party had decided that there was no need for a meeting.
Is it me or is something terribly wrong here? I've been insulted by a co-worker, I've gone through the proper channels by informing our boss and requesting a meeting, and because the person who started this doesn't have the courage to discuss it with me in front of our boss, then that's the end of it? Am I supposed to pretend the incident never happened and go back to business as usual? Isn't that sort of like trying to close the barn door after the horse has already run off?
I've decided that it's pointless to be angry at my co-worker. Since no one else seems to have a problem with me, and their stakes are much higher, it's clear that the problem is hers, not mine. The only thing for me to do is make sure that I have as little contact with her as possible. I refuse to knowingly put myself in a situation to be insulted again. But now I'm struggling with how I should feel/respond towards my boss. By doing nothing, I believe that she is condoning this type of behavior as acceptable, when clearly it is not. Under the circumstances, and knowing the party involved, I did not expect an apology, but I think I deserve an explanation. I think I'm owed at least some semblence of closure.
So far, I've resisted the temptation to say or do anything rash. This is not worth quitting over (although the thought did cross my mind for a minute), but I've been warned. Now that this barn door has been opened, it's not going to close any time soon.
After getting over the initial shock, I took several deep breaths, drafted an e-mail reply to her, took several more deep breaths, and then sent her an e-mail. I told her that I was stunned and offended by her behavior and that I couldn't imagine what would cause her to accuse me of spying on her, and for what purpose? I told her that short of a life-threatening emergency, I would not set foot in her building (much less her "personal space") ever again. All I need is for some cash or her purse to come up missing, and have her blame me for it.
I then proceeded to tell her that since she obviously had concerns about my trustworthiness and my integrity (two values that are extremely important to me), that she, our boss and I should schedule a meeting to discuss her concerns. Almost immediately she responded with a brief e-mail simply saying that she saw no need for a meeting, she was simply letting me know "how she felt."
I spoke with our boss later, who assured me that she had absolutely no concerns about me or my work, and re-iterated that my clients all "love me". She agreed that the 3 of us needed to meet so that we could identify the underlying issues and resolve this matter so we could move forward. She was going to set the meeting up for 2:00. I didn't hear another word until a few minutes before 5, when my boss informed me that the other party had decided that there was no need for a meeting.
Is it me or is something terribly wrong here? I've been insulted by a co-worker, I've gone through the proper channels by informing our boss and requesting a meeting, and because the person who started this doesn't have the courage to discuss it with me in front of our boss, then that's the end of it? Am I supposed to pretend the incident never happened and go back to business as usual? Isn't that sort of like trying to close the barn door after the horse has already run off?
I've decided that it's pointless to be angry at my co-worker. Since no one else seems to have a problem with me, and their stakes are much higher, it's clear that the problem is hers, not mine. The only thing for me to do is make sure that I have as little contact with her as possible. I refuse to knowingly put myself in a situation to be insulted again. But now I'm struggling with how I should feel/respond towards my boss. By doing nothing, I believe that she is condoning this type of behavior as acceptable, when clearly it is not. Under the circumstances, and knowing the party involved, I did not expect an apology, but I think I deserve an explanation. I think I'm owed at least some semblence of closure.
So far, I've resisted the temptation to say or do anything rash. This is not worth quitting over (although the thought did cross my mind for a minute), but I've been warned. Now that this barn door has been opened, it's not going to close any time soon.
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